With each pregnancy, I have been surprised at the blues that hit. The whole process of carrying, delivering and having a baby is such an emotional roller coaster! But about half way through I have consistently hit an emotional wall that I'm never quite prepared for. I'm ready for tears and irrational sensitivity, but this is not that. It is a numbness. No energy. No motivation to get stuff done. If I want a good day lately I have to so calculatedly plan and prepare. I need to exercise, eat healthy, have a plan for the day, keep up on my iron pills, pray hard and even having a written list to check off helps a lot. On the days I waver on any one of those items, the day is shot. I am lazy, boring, tired, and basically have no feeling at all. I have felt so bad for my sweet boys that used to have a pretty fun mom, with the physical ability to play hard, and enough lap room for them to sit on. These days I feel like I don't have much to offer.
So here's to starting new tomorrow and working hard to make good days happen.
No matter how immobilized and dazed I feel, at the end of the day, I have an overwhelming gratitude for the 3 sweet boys in my life.
I love these pictures of the munchkins that give my life a lot of meaning.
4 comments:
SARA, You are such a terrific, amazing, fun and loving mom even when you feel low, your 3 boys are all so blessed to just have you in the room with them!!!
I know exactly what you are talking about, and it seemed to hit the hardest when I was pregnant with Sid. I even fell out of a couple of friendships during that "numb" time. Don't be hard on yourself on those bad days! You are such a sweet momma and sometimes boring is ok, sometimes kids need boring moms. Thanks for the reminder that we also have the ability to change things or at least keep trying. Love you Sara!
your boys are the cutest.
AND just a smidge jealous that you're having a girl :) she'll be a babe.
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