Time

I have tucked my busy little bundles in, and it's that time of night when my dramatic, reflective side hits. Time flies! I hear that phrase a lot, I use it a lot, so much that it stops meaning as much. But tonight, it meant a lot. as I kissed my boys sweet cheeks. I couldn't really bare the thought of how fast four years of motherhood has gone. And by fast, I don't mean fast, but I don't know how else to describe it. 4 years has felt like 4 years. and when I say "I can't believe Owen is 4 and lewis is 20 months" well I can believe it, It makes sense. What I really mean is, how am I supposed to cope with the fact that they grow and change in such a constant way?! How am I supposed to be ok that Owen's wrist rolls are gone and Lewie is not much of a baby anymore? How am I supposed to be ok with the fact that Owen's thick curls and munchkin voice were only here for a fleeting moment. How do i deal with the fact that I will never see Lewie's pudgy diaper bum crawl across the floor again? Motherhood is such an indescribable whirlwind. It is such a mix of vivid memories and time making things a blur. A mix of missing old times and loving the present. A mix of happy and sad, and needing the past and wanting the future. You know in Malachi where we are told that such blessings will be poured out that we will not have room enough to receive it? Thats exactly what it is. My heart literally does not have room to receive these two miraculous blessings. I am so blessed with the past and the present that I don't know how to handle it. 

Some pictures from the fall, that make me so happy:

 When we lived with the Peters, helping Treav drive home from church was a favorite!